Sometimes an idea for a blog post jumps into my brain and hangs around nagging me until I sit in front of my keyboard and type away. The lovely surprise for me is how the words just pour out and later, as I read back and self-edit, I am a little shocked and proud at the pretty turns of words and evocative phrases that I had created. Ego? Perhaps. But for the most part I fret about how little talent I actually have and how audacious I can be at times to say that yes, I can write and perhaps write well. I worry that no one really wants to read what I write and they only click Like on my facebook link to appease my attention-seeking side. Do they roll their eyes a wee bit? There there, Kris, they say. Stop clogging up my feed with your incessant babble I imagine they mutter….
But whatever, I say to myself. I don’t write to please anyone but my own inner spirit. At least that is what I tell myself. Who doesn’t love a genuine compliment about something they are proud of? I pluck away from time to time on a story that I have been working on for a couple of years now. I read back and I like it. I really think that it would be a book I might buy if it were written by someone else. But that inner demonic fear of failure and not being good enough sure can have a loud enough voice to convince me otherwise.
WRITE said a friend to me last night in a message. WRITE!!!
And so, I will.
I need to write, to flex my creative muscles in my head. I love to jot down a sentence that appears magically in my mind. Like for instance, the other day on the chairlift at Whitewater, I breathed in deep and marveled at the scent of the air. How can snow have a scent? But it was there, faint and gentle, cloaked in cold, and gently feathered with the sweet tang of alpine spruce. The silence of the mountain only served to enhance this scent somehow, so delicate it might not even be real. I breathed in, wishing to magnify it and make it more tangible. Yet the delicacy and nuance of that elusive fragrance is what made it so beautiful. How fleeting it was, this magic. How fortunate I felt to experience it.
And so, I write.
PS…. Thanks Jenny. For your words of support and a wee kick in the ass. 🙂